values - "Why I voted Democrat" (satire?)

From: baja  Sent: Wednesday, June 03, 2009

          - I voted Democrat because I love the  fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I've decided to marry my horse.

         - I voted  Democrat because I believe  oil companies' profits of 7% on a gallon of gas are obscene, but the government taxing the same gallon of gas  at 15% isn't.

- I voted  Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money - I earn than I would.

- I voted Democrat because freedom of speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

- I voted Democrat because when we pull out of Iraq, I trust that the bad guys will stop what they are doing because they now think we are good people.

- I voted Democrat because I'm way too irresponsible to own a gun, and I know that my local police are all I need to protect me from murderers and thieves.

- I voted Democrat because I believe  that people who can't tell us if it will rain on Friday, can tell us  that the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don't start driving a Prius.

- I voted  Democrat because I'm not  concerned about the slaughter of millions of babies so long as we keep all death row inmates alive.

- I voted Democrat because I think illegal aliens have a right to free health care, education and Social Security benefits.

- I voted  Democrat because I believe that business should not be allowed to make profits for  themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as the democrats see fit.

- I voted Democrat because I believe liberal judges need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit some fringe kooks who would never get their agendas past the voters.

- I voted  Democrat because my head is so firmly planted up my butt that it is unlikely that I'll ever have another point of view.

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