Tuesday, July 12, 2011

o'emperor's new clothes - Pathological Narcissist + Fables (some light & not so light reading)

From: donl Sent: Sunday, July 10, 2011 Subject:  Pathological Narcissist
     Dr.  Sam Vaknin is an Israeli psychologist.  Interesting view on our president.  Dr.  Vaknin has written extensively about narcissism, including "America, the Dictatorship".   Read his Curriculum Vitae.   More on narcissism.
Be sure to read all the way to the end of his opine. 
article source:
https://roblorinov.wordpress.com/2011/06/12/a-psychologists-assessment-on-barack-obama/

A Psychologist's Assessment on Barack Obama

     Dr.  Vaknin States "I must confess I was impressed by Obama from the first time I saw him.  At first I was excited to see a black candidate.  He looked youthful, spoke well, appeared to be confident -- a wholesome presidential package.  I was put off soon, not just because of his shallowness but also because there was an air of haughtiness in his demeanor that was unsettling.  His posture and his body language were louder than his empty words.  Obama's speeches are unlike any political speech we have heard in American history.  Never a politician in this land had such quasi "religious" impact on so many people
Dr. Sigmund Freud caricature     The fact that Obama is a total incognito with Zero accomplishment, makes this inexplicable infatuation alarming.  Obama is not an ordinary man.  He is not a genius.  In fact he is quite ignorant on most important subjects." 
     Dr.  Sam Vaknin, the author of the Malignant Self Love believes "Barack Obama appears to be a narcissist." Vaknin is a world authority on narcissism.  He understands narcissism and describes the inner mind of a narcissist like no other person.  When he talks about narcissism everyone listens.  Vaknin says that Obama's language, posture and demeanor, and the testimonies of his closest, dearest friends suggest that the man is either a narcissist or he may have narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). 
     Narcissists project a grandiose but false image of themselves.  Jim Jones, the charismatic leader of People's Temple, the man who led over 900 of his followers to cheerfully commit mass suicide and even murder their own children was also a narcissist.  David Koresh, Charles Manson, Joseph Koni, Shoko Asahara, Stalin, Saddam, Mao, Kim Jong Ill and Adolph Hitler are a few examples of narcissists of our time.  All these men had a tremendous influence over their fanciers.  They created a personality cult around themselves and with their blazing speeches elevated their admirers, filled their hearts with enthusiasm and instilled in their minds a new zest for life.  They gave them hope! They promised them the moon, but alas, invariably they brought them to their doom
    When you are a victim of a cult of personality, you don't know it until it is too late.  One determining factor in the development of NPD is childhood abuse "Obama's early life was decidedly chaotic and replete with traumatic and mentally bruising dislocations, "says Vaknin.  "Mixed-race marriages were even less common then.  His parents went through a divorce when he was an infant two years old.  Obama saw his father only once again, before he died in a car accident.  Then his mother re-married and Obama had to relocate to Indonesia , a foreign land with a radically foreign culture, to be raised by a step-father.  At the age of ten, he was whisked off to live with his maternal (white) grandparents.  He saw his mother only intermittently in the following few years and then she vanished from his life in 1979.  "She died of cancer in 1995." 
     One must never underestimate the manipulative genius of pathological narcissists.  They project such an imposing personality that it overwhelms those around them.  Charmed by the charisma of the narcissist, people become like clay in his hands.  They cheerfully do his bidding and delight to be at his service..  The narcissist shapes the world around himself and reduces others in his own inverted image.  He creates a cult of personality.  His admirers become his co-dependents.  Narcissists have no interest in things that do not help them to reach their personal objective.  They are focused on one thing alone and that is power.  All other issues are meaningless to them and they do not want to waste their precious time on trivialities.  Anything that does not help them is beneath them and does not deserve their attention. 
     If an issue raised in the Senate does not help Obama in one way or another, he has no interest in it.  The "present" vote is a safe vote.  No one can criticize him if things go wrong.  Those issues are unworthy by their very nature because they are not about him. 
     Obama's election as the first black president of the Harvard Law Review led to a contract and advance to write a book about race relations.  The University of Chicago Law School provided him a lot longer than expected and at the end it evolved into, guess what? His own autobiography! Instead of writing a scholarly paper focusing on race relations, for which he had been paid, Obama could not resist writing about his most sublime self.  He entitled the book "Dreams from My Father".
     Not surprisingly, Adolph Hitler also wrote his own autobiography when he was still a nobody.  So did Stalin.  For a narcissist no subject is as important as his own self.  Why would he waste his precious time and genius writing about insignificant things when he can write about such an august being as himself? 
     Narcissists are often callous and even ruthless.  As the norm, they lack conscience.  This is evident from Obama's lack of interest in his own brother who lives on only one dollar per month.  A man who lives in luxury, who takes a private jet to vacation in Hawaii, and who raised nearly half a billion dollars for his campaign (something unprecedented in history) has no interest in the plight of his own brother.  Why? Because, his brother cannot be used for his ascent to power.  A narcissist cares for no one but himself. 
     This election was like no other in the history of America.  The issues were insignificant compared to what is at stake.  What can be more dangerous than having a man bereft of conscience, a serial liar, and one who cannot distinguish his fantasies from reality as the leader of the free world? 
     I hate to sound alarmist, but one is a fool if one is not alarmed.  Many politicians are narcissists.  They pose no threat to others.  They are simply self serving and selfish.  Obama evidences symptoms of pathological narcissism, which is different from the run-of-the-mill narcissism of a Richard Nixon or a Bill Clinton for example.  To him reality and fantasy are intertwined. 
     This is a mental health issue, not just a character flaw. 
     Pathological narcissists are dangerous because they look normal and even intelligent.  It is this disguise that makes them treacherous.  Today the Democrats have placed all their hopes in Obama.  But this man could put an end to their party.  The great majority of blacks voted for Obama.  Only a fool does not know that their support for him is racially driven.  This is racism, pure and simple The downside of this is that if Obama turns out to be the disaster I predict, he will cause widespread resentment among the whites.  The blacks are unlikely to give up their support of their man.  Cultic mentality is pernicious and unrelenting.  They will dig their heads deeper in the sand and blame Obama's detractors of racism.  This will cause a backlash among the whites.  The white supremacists will take advantage of the discontent and they will receive widespread support.  I predict that in less than four years, racial tensions will increase to levels never seen since the turbulent 1960's
     Obama will set the clock back decades.  America is the bastion of freedom.  The peace of the world depends on the strength of America , and its weakness translates into the triumph of terrorism and victory of rogue nations.  It is no wonder that Ahmadinejad, Hugo Chavez, the Castroists, the Hezbollah, the Hamas, the lawyers of the Guantanamo terrorists, and virtually all sworn enemies of America are so thrilled by the prospect of their man in the White House. 
     America is on the verge of destruction. 
     There is no insanity greater than electing a pathological narcissist as president. 


Download Interview in HD Video or for iPod or Read the Transcript
Barack Obama - Narcissist or Merely Narcissistic?
     Barack Obama appears to be a narcissist.  Scroll down for a detailed treatment.  Click here to read the section: "First Year in Office".
     Granted, only a qualified mental health diagnostician can determine whether someone suffers from Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) and this, following lengthy tests and personal interviews. Read the Disclaimer below. But, in the absence of access to Barack Obama, one has to rely on his overt performance and on testimonies by his closest, nearest and dearest.
     Narcissistic leaders are nefarious and their effects pernicious. They are subtle, refined, socially-adept, manipulative, possessed of thespian skills, and convincing. Both types equally lack empathy and are ruthless and relentless or driven.
     Perhaps it is time to require each candidate to high office in the USA to submit to a rigorous physical and mental checkup with the results made public.

I. Upbringing and Childhood

Obama's early life was decidedly chaotic and replete with traumatic and mentally bruising dislocations. Mixed-race marriages were even less common then. His parents went through a divorce when he was an infant (two years old). Obama saw his father only once again, before he died in a car accident. Then, his mother re-married and Obama had to relocate to Indonesia: a foreign land with a radically foreign culture, to be raised by a step-father. At the age of ten, he was whisked off to live with his maternal (white) grandparents. He saw his mother only intermittently in the following few years and then she vanished from his life in 1979. She died of cancer in 1995.

Pathological narcissism is a reaction to prolonged abuse and trauma in early childhood or early adolescence. The source of the abuse or trauma is immaterial: the perpetrators could be dysfunctional or absent parents, teachers, other adults, or peers.

II. Behavior Patterns
The narcissist:
  • Feels grandiose and self-important (e.g., exaggerates accomplishments, talents, skills, contacts, and personality traits to the point of lying, demands to be recognised as superior without commensurate achievements);
  • Is obsessed with fantasies of unlimited success, fame, fearsome power or omnipotence, unequalled brilliance (the cerebral narcissist), bodily beauty or sexual performance (the somatic narcissist), or ideal, everlasting, all-conquering love or passion;
  • Firmly convinced that he or she is unique and, being special, can only be understood by, should only be treated by, or associate with, other special or unique, or high-status people (or institutions);
  • Requires excessive admiration, adulation, attention and affirmation – or, failing that, wishes to be feared and to be notorious (Narcissistic Supply);
  • Feels entitled. Demands automatic and full compliance with his or her unreasonable expectations for special and favourable priority treatment;
  • Is "interpersonally exploitative", i.e., uses others to achieve his or her own ends;
  • Devoid of empathy. Is unable or unwilling to identify with, acknowledge, or accept the feelings, needs, preferences, priorities, and choices of others;
  • Constantly envious of others and seeks to hurt or destroy the objects of his or her frustration. Suffers from persecutory (paranoid) delusions as he or she believes that they feel the same about him or her and are likely to act similarly;
  • Behaves arrogantly and haughtily. Feels superior, omnipotent, omniscient, invincible, immune, "above the law", and omnipresent (magical thinking). Rages when frustrated, contradicted, or confronted by people he or she considers inferior to him or her and unworthy.
     Narcissism is a defense mechanism whose role is to deflect hurt and trauma from the victim's "True Self" into a "False Self" which is omnipotent, invulnerable, and omniscient. This False Self is then used by the narcissist to garner narcissistic supply from his human environment. Narcissistic supply is any form of attention, both positive and negative and it is instrumental in the regulation of the narcissist's labile sense of self-worth.
     
Perhaps the most immediately evident trait of patients with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is their vulnerability to criticism and disagreement. Subject to negative input, real or imagined, even to a mild rebuke, a constructive suggestion, or an offer to help, they feel injured, humiliated and empty and they react with disdain (devaluation), rage, and defiance.
"To avoid such intolerable pain, some patients with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) socially withdraw and feign false modesty and humility to mask their underlying grandiosity. Dysthymic and depressive disorders are common reactions to isolation and feelings of shame and inadequacy."
     Owing to their lack of empathy, disregard for others, exploitativeness, sense of entitlement, and constant need for attention (narcissistic supply), narcissists are rarely able to maintain functional and healthy interpersonal relationships.
     Many narcissists are over-achievers and ambitious. Some of them are even talented and skilled. But they are incapable of team work because they cannot tolerate setbacks. They are easily frustrated and demoralized and are unable to cope with disagreement and criticism. Though some narcissists have meteoric and inspiring careers, in the long-run, all of them find it difficult to maintain long-term professional achievements and the respect and appreciation of their peers. The narcissist's fantastic grandiosity, frequently coupled with a hypomanic mood, is typically incommensurate with his or her real accomplishments (the "grandiosity gap").
     An important distinction is between cerebral and somatic narcissists. The cerebrals derive their Narcissistic Supply from their intelligence or academic achievements and the somatics derive their Narcissistic Supply from their physique, exercise, physical or sexual prowess and romantic or physical "conquests".
     Another crucial division within the ranks of patients with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is between the classic variety (those who meet five of the nine diagnostic criteria included in the DSM), and the compensatory kind (their narcissism compensates for deep-set feelings of inferiority and lack of self-worth).
     Obama displays the following behaviors, which are among the hallmarks of pathological narcissism:
  • Subtly misrepresents facts and expediently and opportunistically shifts positions, views, opinions, and "ideals" (e.g., about campaign finance, re-districting). These flip-flops do not cause him overt distress and are ego-syntonic (he feels justified in acting this way). Alternatively, refuses to commit to a standpoint and, in the process, evidences a lack of empathy.

    Ignores data that conflict with his fantasy world, or with his inflated and grandiose self-image. This has to do with magical thinking. Obama already sees himself as president because he is firmly convinced that his dreams, thoughts, and wishes affect reality. Additionally, he denies the gap between his fantasies and his modest or limited real-life achievements (for instance, in 12 years of academic career, he hasn't published a single scholarly paper or book).

    Feels that he is above the law, incl. and especially his own laws.

    Talks about himself in the 3rd person singular or uses the regal "we" and craves to be the exclusive center of attention, even adulation

    Has a messianic-cosmic vision of himself and his life and his "mission". Consequently, sets unrealistic goals within unrealistic timeframes.

    Sets ever more complex rules in a convoluted world of grandiose fantasies with its own language (jargon)

    Displays false modesty and unctuous "folksiness" but unable to sustain these behaviors (the persona, or mask) for long. It slips and the true Obama is revealed: haughty, aloof, distant, and disdainful of simple folk and their lives.

    Sublimates aggression and holds grudges.

    Behaves as an eternal adolescent (e.g., his choice of language, youthful image he projects, demands indulgence and feels entitled to special treatment, even though his objective accomplishments do not justify it).
III. Body Language

     Many complain of the incredible deceptive powers of the narcissist. They find themselves involved with narcissists (emotionally, in business, or otherwise) before they have a chance to discover their true character. Shocked by the later revelation, they mourn their inability to separate from the narcissist and their gullibility.
     Narcissists are an elusive breed, hard to spot, harder to pinpoint, impossible to capture. Even an experienced mental health diagnostician with unmitigated access to the record and to the person examined would find it fiendishly difficult to determine with any degree of certainty whether someone suffers from a full fledgedNarcissistic Personality Disorder – or merely possesses narcissistic traits, a narcissistic style, a personality structure ("character"), or a narcissistic "overlay" superimposed on another mental health problem.
     Moreover, it is important to distinguish between traits and behavior patterns that are independent of the patient's cultural-social context (i.e., which are inherent, or idiosyncratic) – and reactive patterns, or conformity to cultural and social morals and norms. Reactions to severe life crises or circumstances are also often characterized by transient pathological narcissism, for instance (Ronningstam and Gunderson, 1996). But such reactions do not a narcissist make.
     When a person belongs to a society or culture that has often been described as narcissistic by scholars (such as Theodore Millon) and social thinkers (e.g.,Christopher Lasch) – how much of his behavior can be attributed to his milieu and which of his traits are really his?
     The Narcissistic Personality Disorder is rigorously defined in the DSM IV-TR with a set of strict criteria and differential diagnoses.
     Narcissism is regarded by many scholars to be an adaptative strategy ("healthy narcissism"). It is considered pathological in the clinical sense only when it becomes a rigid personality structure replete with a series of primitive defence mechanisms (such as splitting, projection, projective identification, or intellectualization) – and when it leads to dysfunctions in one or more areas of the patient's life.
     Pathological narcissism is the art of deception. The narcissist projects a False Self and manages all his social interactions through this concocted fictional construct.
     When the narcissist reveals his true colors, it is usually far too late. His victims are unable to separate from him. They are frustrated by this acquired helplessness and angry at themselves for having they failed to see through the narcissist earlier on.
But the narcissist does emit subtle, almost subliminal, signals ("presenting symptoms") even in a first or casual encounter. Compare the following list to Barack Obama's body language during his public appearances.
These are:
     "Haughty" body language – The narcissist adopts a physical posture which implies and exudes an air of superiority, seniority, hidden powers, mysteriousness, amused indifference, etc. Though the narcissist usually maintains sustained and piercing eye contact, he often refrains from physical proximity (he is "territorial").
     The narcissist takes part in social interactions – even mere banter – condescendingly, from a position of supremacy and faux "magnanimity and largesse". But he rarely mingles socially and prefers to remain the "observer", or the "lone wolf".
     Entitlement markers – The narcissist immediately asks for "special treatment" of some kind. Not to wait his turn, to have a longer or a shorter therapeutic session, to talk directly to authority figures (and not to their assistants or secretaries), to be granted special payment terms, to enjoy custom tailored arrangements - or to get served first.
     The narcissist is the one who – vocally and demonstratively – demands the undivided attention of the head waiter in a restaurant, or monopolizes the hostess, or latches on to celebrities in a party. The narcissist reacts with rage and indignantly when denied his wishes and if treated equally with others whom he deems inferior.
     Idealization or devaluation – The narcissist instantly idealizes or devalues his interlocutor. This depends on how the narcissist appraises the potential his converser has as a Narcissistic Supply Source. The narcissist flatters, adores, admires and applauds the "target" in an embarrassingly exaggerated and profuse manner – or sulks, abuses, and humiliates her.
     Narcissists are polite only in the presence of a potential Supply Source. But they are unable to sustain even perfunctory civility and fast deteriorate to barbs and thinly-veiled hostility, to verbal or other violent displays of abuse, rage attacks, or cold detachment.
     The "membership" posture – The narcissist always tries to "belong". Yet, at the very same time, he maintains his stance as an outsider. The narcissist seeks to be admired for his ability to integrate and ingratiate himself without investing the efforts commensurate with such an undertaking.
     For instance: if the narcissist talks to a psychologist, the narcissist first states emphatically that he never studied psychology. He then proceeds to make seemingly effortless use of obscure professional terms, thus demonstrating that he mastered the discipline all the same, as an autodidact – which proves that he is exceptionally intelligent or introspective.
     In general, the narcissist always prefers show-off to substance. One of the most effective methods of exposing a narcissist is by trying to delve deeper. The narcissist is shallow, a pond pretending to be an ocean. He likes to think of himself as a Renaissance man, a Jack of all trades. The narcissist never admits to ignorance in any field – yet, typically, he is ignorant of them all. It is surprisingly easy to penetrate the gloss and the veneer of the narcissist's self-proclaimed omniscience.
     Bragging and false autobiography  The narcissist brags incessantly. His speech is peppered with "I", "my", "myself", and "mine". He describes himself as intelligent, or rich, or modest, or intuitive, or creative – but always excessively, implausibly, and extraordinarily so.
     The narcissist's biography sounds unusually rich and complex. His achievements – incommensurate with his age, education, or renown. Yet, his actual condition is evidently and demonstrably incompatible with his claims. Very often, the narcissist lies or his fantasies are easily discernible. He always name-drops and appropriates other people's experiences and accomplishments.
     Emotion-free language – The narcissist likes to talk about himself and only about himself. He is not interested in others or what they have to say, unless they constitute potential Sources of Supply and in order to obtain said supply. He acts bored, disdainful, even angry, if he feels that they are intruding on his precious time and, thus, abusing him.
     In general, the narcissist is very impatient, easily bored, with strong attention deficits – unless and until he is the topic of discussion. One can publicly dissect all aspects of the intimate life of a narcissist without repercussions, providing the discourse is not "emotionally tinted".
     If asked to relate directly to his emotions, the narcissist intellectualizes, rationalizes, speaks about himself in the third person and in a detached "scientific" tone or composes a narrative with a fictitious character in it, suspiciously autobiographical. Narcissists like to refer to themselves in mechanical terms, as efficient automata ormachines.
     Seriousness and sense of intrusion and coercion – The narcissist is dead serious about himself. He may possess a subtle, wry, and riotous sense of humor, scathing and cynical, but rarely is he self-deprecating. The narcissist regards himself as being on a constant mission, whose importance is cosmic and whose consequences are global. If a scientist – he is always in the throes of revolutionizing science. If a journalist – he is in the middle of the greatest story ever. If a novelist - he is on his way to a Booker or Nobel prize.
     This self-misperception is not amenable to light-headedness or self-effacement. The narcissist is easily hurt and insulted (narcissistic injury). Even the most innocuous remarks or acts are interpreted by him as belittling, intruding, or coercive. His time is more valuable than others' – therefore, it cannot be wasted on unimportant matters such as mere banter or going out for a walk.
Any suggested help, advice, or concerned inquiry are immediately cast by the narcissist as intentional humiliation, implying that the narcissist is in need of help and counsel and, thus, imperfect and less than omnipotent. Any attempt to set an agenda is, to the narcissist, an intimidating act of enslavement. In this sense, the narcissist is both schizoid and paranoid and often entertains ideas of reference.
      These – the lack of empathy, the aloofness, the disdain, the sense of entitlement, the constricted sense of humor, the unequal treatment and the paranoia – render the narcissist a social misfit. The narcissist is able to provoke in his milieu, in his casual acquaintances, even in his psychotherapist, the strongest, most avid and furious hatred and revulsion. To his shock, indignation and consternation, he invariably induces in others unbridled aggression.
      He is perceived to be asocial at best and, often, antisocial. This, perhaps, is the strongest presenting symptom. One feels ill at ease in the presence of a narcissist for no apparent reason. No matter how charming, intelligent, thought provoking, outgoing, easy going and social the narcissist is – he fails to secure the sympathy of others, a sympathy he is never ready, willing, or able to reciprocate.
     IV. Narcissistic and psychopathic Leaders 
     The narcissistic or psychopathic leader is the culmination and reification of his period, culture, and civilization. He is likely to rise to prominence in narcissistic societies.
     The malignant narcissist invents and then projects a false, fictitious, self for the world to fear, or to admire. He maintains a tenuous grasp on reality to start with and this is further exacerbated by the trappings of power. The narcissist's grandiose self-delusions and fantasies of omnipotence and omniscience are supported by real life authority and the narcissist's predilection to surround himself with obsequious sycophants.
     The narcissist's personality is so precariously balanced that he cannot tolerate even a hint of criticism and disagreement. Most narcissists are paranoid and suffer from ideas of reference (the delusion that they are being mocked or discussed when they are not). Thus, narcissists often regard themselves as "victims of persecution".
     The narcissistic leader fosters and encourages a personality cult with all the hallmarks of an institutional religion: priesthood, rites, rituals, temples, worship, catechism, mythology. The leader is this religion's ascetic saint. He monastically denies himself earthly pleasures (or so he claims) in order to be able to dedicate himself fully to his calling.
     The narcissistic leader is a monstrously inverted Jesus, sacrificing his life and denying himself so that his people - or humanity at large - should benefit. By surpassing and suppressing his humanity, the narcissistic leader became a distorted version of Nietzsche's "superman".
     But being a-human or super-human also means being a-sexual and a-moral.
     In this restricted sense, narcissistic leaders are post-modernist and moral relativists. They project to the masses an androgynous figure and enhance it by engendering the adoration of nudity and all things "natural" - or by strongly repressing these feelings. But what they refer to as "nature" is not natural at all.
     The narcissistic leader invariably proffers an aesthetic of decadence and evil carefully orchestrated and artificial - though it is not perceived this way by him or by his followers. Narcissistic leadership is about reproduced copies, not about originals. It is about the manipulation of symbols - not about veritable atavism or true conservatism.
     In short: narcissistic leadership is about theatre, not about life. To enjoy the spectacle (and be subsumed by it), the leader demands the suspension of judgment, depersonalization, and de-realization. Catharsis is tantamount, in this narcissistic dramaturgy, to self-annulment.
     Narcissism is nihilistic not only operationally, or ideologically. Its very language and narratives are nihilistic. Narcissism is conspicuous nihilism - and the cult's leader serves as a role model, annihilating the Man, only to re-appear as a pre-ordained and irresistible force of nature.
     Narcissistic leadership often poses as a rebellion against the "old ways" - against the hegemonic culture, the upper classes, the established religions, the superpowers, the corrupt order.      Narcissistic movements are puerile, a reaction to narcissistic injuries inflicted upon a narcissistic (and rather psychopathic) toddler nation-state, or group, or upon the leader.
     Minorities or "others" - often arbitrarily selected - constitute a perfect, easily identifiable, embodiment of all that is "wrong". They are accused of being old, they are eerily disembodied, they are cosmopolitan, they are part of the establishment, they are "decadent", they are hated on religious and socio-economic grounds, or because of their race, sexual orientation, origin ... They are different, they are narcissistic (feel and act as morally superior), they are everywhere, they are defenceless, they are credulous, they are adaptable (and thus can be co-opted to collaborate in their own destruction). They are the perfect hate figure. Narcissists thrive on hatred and pathological envy.
     This is precisely the source of the fascination with Hitler, diagnosed by Erich Fromm - together with Stalin - as a malignant narcissist. He was an inverted human. His unconscious was his conscious. He acted out our most repressed drives, fantasies, and wishes. He provides us with a glimpse of the horrors that lie beneath the veneer, the barbarians at our personal gates, and what it was like before we invented civilization. Hitler forced us all through a time warp and many did not emerge. He was not the devil. He was one of us. He was what Arendt aptly called the banality of evil. Just an ordinary, mentally disturbed, failure, a member of a mentally disturbed and failing nation, who lived through disturbed and failing times. He was the perfect mirror, a channel, a voice, and the very depth of our souls.
     The narcissistic leader prefers the sparkle and glamour of well-orchestrated illusions to the tedium and method of real accomplishments. His reign is all smoke and mirrors, devoid of substances, consisting of mere appearances and mass delusions. In the aftermath of his regime - the narcissistic leader having died, been deposed, or voted out of office - it all unravels. The tireless and constant prestidigitation ceases and the entire edifice crumbles. What looked like an economic miracle turns out to have been a fraud-laced bubble. Loosely-held empires disintegrate.    Laboriously assembled business conglomerates go to pieces. "Earth shattering" and "revolutionary" scientific discoveries and theories are discredited. Social experiments end in mayhem.
     It is important to understand that the use of violence must be ego-syntonic. It must accord with the self-image of the narcissist. It must abet and sustain his grandiose fantasies and feed his sense of entitlement. It must conform with the narcissistic narrative.
     Thus, a narcissist who regards himself as the benefactor of the poor, a member of the common folk, the representative of the disenfranchised, the champion of the dispossessed against the corrupt elite - is highly unlikely to use violence at first.
     The pacific mask crumbles when the narcissist has become convinced that the very people he purported to speak for, his constituency, his grassroots fans, the prime sources of his narcissistic supply - have turned against him. At first, in a desperate effort to maintain the fiction underlying his chaotic personality, the narcissist strives to explain away the sudden reversal of sentiment. "The people are being duped by (the media, big industry, the military, the elite, etc.)", "they don't really know what they are doing", "following a rude awakening, they will revert to form", etc.
     When these flimsy attempts to patch a tattered personal mythology fail - the narcissist is injured. Narcissistic injury inevitably leads to narcissistic rage and to a terrifying display of unbridled aggression. The pent-up frustration and hurt translate into devaluation. That which was previously idealized - is now discarded with contempt and hatred.
     This primitive defense mechanism is called "splitting". To the narcissist, things and people are either entirely bad (evil) or entirely good. He projects onto others his own shortcomings and negative emotions, thus becoming a totally good object. A narcissistic leader is likely to justify the butchering of his own people by claiming that they intended to kill him, undo the revolution, devastate the economy, or the country, etc.
     The "small people", the "rank and file", the "loyal soldiers" of the narcissist - his flock, his nation, his employees - they pay the price. The disillusionment and disenchantment are agonizing. The process of reconstruction, of rising from the ashes, of overcoming the trauma of having been deceived, exploited and manipulated - is drawn-out. It is difficult to trust again, to have faith, to love, to be led, to collaborate. Feelings of shame and guilt engulf the erstwhile followers of the narcissist. This is his sole legacy: a massive post-traumatic stress disorder.
Predictably, Barack Obama's narcissistic behaviours grew worse and more visible during his first year in office. As I noted in a radio interview (an observation later picked up by George F. Will), Obama's first person "pronoun density" has increased since his inauguration. Properly measured, first person pronoun density reflects the number of times a person substitutes first person pronouns for more appropriate third and other person pronouns. Thus, to say: "My country, right or wrong" is not indicative of a narcissistic self-preoccupation; but the sentence: "The Russians were afraid of me" is improper because, clearly, the Russians are not afraid of any single individual: they are afraid of what he or she represents. Thus, context counts. It is wrong to merely count the times Obama has used "I", "my", or "mine" in his speeches and utterances (as George F. Will did).
     Obama's pronoun density has doubled between January 20, 2009 and October 2009. It then subsided, though it is still about 50% over the level exhibited during his election campaign. This would seem to indicate that his pathological narcissism has been exacerbated in office as he was probably basking in media attention and the trappings of power. The backlash, such as it was, against several of his more egregious behaviours and faux-pas led him to modify his conduct and pay closer attention to his syntax and grammar: Obama is now acting modest. False modesty is another hallmark of raging, malignant narcissism.
     Obama's body language has become more pronounced and haughty while in office. For example: I measured the number of times he tilted his head upwards and in an angle during speeches and public appearances (literally gazing skywards and avoiding eye contact with his public). The frequency of this particular gesture increased dramatically (almost threefold!) this past year. It is part and parcel of the narcissist's "haughty posture" and his attempt to project omniscience, vision, and a cosmic-messianic mission. Similarly telling gestures and postures have proliferated after Obama has assumed office.
     Another sign of Obama's growing malignant narcissism is his lowered Adversity Tolerance Threshold. I compared the number of times he snapped at critics and journalists during the election campaign and after he became President. The frequency of such temper tantrums has increased, though not drastically. Obama is still maintaining thespian self-control when it comes to the media and to his carefully-cultivated public image. Where he doesn't bother anymore to project benevolence and maturity is with his staff: he is markedly and openly more aggressive and dismissive of his co-workers, underlings, crew, and team, clearly relishing his quasi-sadistic outbursts and their public verbal whipping.
DISCLAIMER
     I am not a mental health professional. Still, I have dedicated the last 12 years to the study of personality disorders in general and the Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) in particular. I have authored nine (9) books about these topics, one of which is a Barnes and Noble best-seller ("Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited"). My work is widely cited in scholarly tomes and publications and in the media. My books and the content of my Web site are based on correspondence since 1996 with hundreds of people suffering from the Narcissistic Personality Disorder (narcissists) and with thousands of their family members, friends, therapists, and colleagues.




fables source: http://forum2.aimoo.com/NARCISSISTICPERSONALITYDISORDER/Motivation-Member-Stories-Jokes/Ladies-Scorpions-Snakes-and-Fa bles-1-342901.html
THE SCORPION AND THE FROG 

Once upon a time there was a scorpion who wanted to get across the lake.  Once day he came upon a frog.  He asked the frog if the frog would be willing to swim across the lake while the scorpion rode upon his back.  The frog replied, "I am sorry Mr.  Scorpion, I can not do that because you will sting me and we will both drown." The scorpion replied, "I give you my word, I promise not to sting you, I just want to get across this lake.  Besides that would be stupid to do that!" So the kind hearted frog trusted the scorpion.  The scorpion crawled on his back and the frog began to swim.  When they got half way across the lake the scorpion stung him viciously in the back.  The frog, now mortally wounded, screamed out crying: "Why did you do that? Don't you realize that now we are both going to die and drown in the lake!" The scorpion responded, "Yes I know, but I could not help it...  IT IS IN MY NATURE" 
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THE LADY AND THE SNAKE 

  "It was really cold and a nice lady had a warm blanket.  A poisonous snake nearby was shivering and begged the lady just to pick him up long enough for him to get warm.  She resisted saying "you are a poisonous snake and you will bite me and I'll die!" He begged and pleaded and promised not to bite her so she finally gave in and picked him up and wrapped him in the blanket.  He bit her and as she was laying there dying she asked "why did you bite me - you promised you wouldn't?" As he slithered away he looked back and said: "Lady you knew I was a snake when you picked me up!" 
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Aesop's Fable 
The Farmer and the Snake 

ONE WINTER a Farmer found a Snake stiff and frozen with cold.  He had compassion on it, and taking it up, placed it in his bosom.  The Snake was quickly revived by the warmth, and resuming its natural instincts, bit its benefactor, inflicting on him a mortal wound.  "Oh," cried the Farmer with his last breath, "I am rightly served for pitying a scoundrel."

The Emperor's New Clothes

     Many years ago there was an Emperor so exceedingly fond of new clothes that he spent all his money on being well dressed.  He cared nothing about reviewing his soldiers, going to the theatre, or going for a ride in his carriage, except to show off his new clothes.  He had a coat for every hour of the day, and instead of saying, as one might, about any other ruler, "The King's in council," here they always said.  "The Emperor's in his dressing room."
The Emperor's New Clothes by Hans Christian Andersen     In the great city where he lived, life was always gay.  Every day many strangers came to town, and among them one day came two swindlers.  They let it be known they were weavers, and they said they could weave the most magnificent fabrics imaginable.  Not only were their colors and patterns uncommonly fine, but clothes made of this cloth had a wonderful way of becoming invisible to anyone who was unfit for his office, or who was unusually stupid.
     "Those would be just the clothes for me," thought the Emperor.  "If I wore them I would be able to discover which men in my empire are unfit for their posts.  And I could tell the wise men from the fools.  Yes, I certainly must get some of the stuff woven for me right away." He paid the two swindlers a large sum of money to start work at once.
     They set up two looms and pretended to weave, though there was nothing on the looms.  All the finest silk and the purest old thread which they demanded went into their traveling bags, while they worked the empty looms far into the night.
     "I'd like to know how those weavers are getting on with the cloth," the Emperor thought, but he felt slightly uncomfortable when he remembered that those who were unfit for their position would not be able to see the fabric.  It couldn't have been that he doubted himself, yet he thought he'd rather send someone else to see how things were going.  The whole town knew about the cloth's peculiar power, and all were impatient to find out how stupid their neighbors were.
     "I'll send my honest old minister to the weavers," the Emperor decided.  "He'll be the best one to tell me how the material looks, for he's a sensible man and no one does his duty better."
     So the honest old minister went to the room where the two swindlers sat working away at their empty looms.
"Heaven help me," he thought as his eyes flew wide open, "I can't see anything at all".  But he did not say so.
     Both the swindlers begged him to be so kind as to come near to approve the excellent pattern, the beautiful colors.  They pointed to the empty looms, and the poor old minister stared as hard as he dared.  He couldn't see anything, because there was nothing to see.  "Heaven have mercy," he thought.  "Can it be that I'm a fool? I'd have never guessed it, and not a soul must know.  Am I unfit to be the minister? It would never do to let on that I can't see the cloth."
     "Don't hesitate to tell us what you think of it," said one of the weavers.
     "Oh, it's beautiful -it's enchanting." The old minister peered through his spectacles.
     "Such a pattern, what colors!" I'll be sure to tell the Emperor how delighted I am with it."
     "We're pleased to hear that," the swindlers said.  They proceeded to name all the colors and to explain the intricate pattern.  The old minister paid the closest attention, so that he could tell it all to the Emperor.  And so he did.
     The swindlers at once asked for more money, more silk and gold thread, to get on with the weaving.  But it all went into their pockets.  Not a thread went into the looms, though they worked at their weaving as hard as ever.
     The Emperor presently sent another trustworthy official to see how the work progressed and how soon it would be ready.  The same thing happened to him that had happened to the minister.  He looked and he looked, but as there was nothing to see in the looms he couldn't see anything.
     "Isn't it a beautiful piece of goods?" the swindlers asked him, as they displayed and described their imaginary pattern.
     "I know I'm not stupid," the man thought, "so it must be that I'm unworthy of my good office.  That's strange.  I mustn't let anyone find it out, though." So he praised the material he did not see.  He declared he was delighted with the beautiful colors and the exquisite pattern.  To the Emperor he said, "It held me spellbound."
     All the town was talking of this splendid cloth, and the Emperor wanted to see it for himself while it was still in the looms.  Attended by a band of chosen men, among whom were his two old trusted officials-the ones who had been to the weavers-he set out to see the two swindlers.  He found them weaving with might and main, but without a thread in their looms.
     "Magnificent," said the two officials already duped.  "Just look, Your Majesty, what colors! What a design!" They pointed to the empty looms, each supposing that the others could see the stuff.
     "What's this?" thought the Emperor.  "I can't see anything.  This is terrible!
     Am I a fool? Am I unfit to be the Emperor? What a thing to happen to me of all people! - Oh! It's very pretty," he said.  "It has my highest approval." And he nodded approbation at the empty loom.  Nothing could make him say that he couldn't see anything.
     His whole retinue stared and stared.  One saw no more than another, but they all joined the Emperor in exclaiming, "Oh! It's very pretty," and they advised him to wear clothes made of this wonderful cloth especially for the great procession he was soon to lead.  "Magnificent! Excellent! Unsurpassed!" were bandied from mouth to mouth, and everyone did his best to seem well pleased.  The Emperor gave each of the swindlers a cross to wear in his buttonhole, and the title of "Sir Weaver."
Before the procession the swindlers sat up all night and burned more than six candles, to show how busy they were finishing the Emperor's new clothes.  They pretended to take the cloth off the loom.  They made cuts in the air with huge scissors.  And at last they said, "Now the Emperor's new clothes are ready for him."
     Then the Emperor himself came with his noblest noblemen, and the swindlers each raised an arm as if they were holding something.  They said, "These are the trousers, here's the coat, and this is the mantle," naming each garment.  "All of them are as light as a spider web.  One would almost think he had nothing on, but that's what makes them so fine."
     "Exactly," all the noblemen agreed, though they could see nothing, for there was nothing to see.
     "If Your Imperial Majesty will condescend to take your clothes off," said the swindlers, "we will help you on with your new ones here in front of the long mirror."
     The Emperor undressed, and the swindlers pretended to put his new clothes on him, one garment after another.  They took him around the waist and seemed to be fastening something - that was his train-as the Emperor turned round and round before the looking glass.
     "How well Your Majesty's new clothes look.  Aren't they becoming!" He heard on all sides, "That pattern, so perfect! Those colors, so suitable! It is a magnificent outfit."
Then the minister of public processions announced: "Your Majesty's canopy is waiting outside."
     "Well, I'm supposed to be ready," the Emperor said, and turned again for one last look in the mirror.  "It is a remarkable fit, isn't it?" He seemed to regard his costume with the greatest interest.
     The noblemen who were to carry his train stooped low and reached for the floor as if they were picking up his mantle.  Then they pretended to lift and hold it high.    They didn't dare admit they had nothing to hold.
     So off went the Emperor in procession under his splendid canopy.  Everyone in the streets and the windows said, "Oh, how fine are the Emperor's new clothes! Don't they fit him to perfection? And see his long train!" Nobody would confess that he couldn't see anything, for that would prove him either unfit for his position, or a fool.  No costume the Emperor had worn before was ever such a complete success.
     "But he hasn't got anything on," a little child said.
     "Did you ever hear such innocent prattle?" said its father.  And one person whispered to another what the child had said, "He hasn't anything on.  A child says he hasn't anything on."
     "But he hasn't got anything on!" the whole town cried out at last.
     The Emperor shivered, for he suspected they were right.  But he thought, "This procession has got to go on." So he walked more proudly than ever, as his noblemen held high the train that wasn't there at all.
By Hans Christian Andersen

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